Book of Jamez

55 y/o malcontent, something of a writer

Category: Friends

  • A Plea For Help

    Today I’m going to talk about my friend Jana.

    I first met Jana in the virtual world of Azeroth in World of Warcraft (WoW) while both of us were in the Warsong Gulch (WSG) battleground – WSG is a capture the flag game and you have two teams of 10. Her character was Janka – then a pre 60 rogue. With her and our trusty friends Grokus, Meltiece, Kerrig, Salthair, Robauk, Noq (that’s me) and others we ruled the pre-cross server WSG … well, sometimes the Alliance would win, but come on… they’re Alliance SCUM! This was before the first expansion when the end goals were the level 60 and … hell I can’t even remember the dungeon that mattered back then. This was back in 2005 and I was new to the MMORP world – Janka was one of my early friends there and helped me feel like I belonged.

    Throughout the years, sometimes every day, we’d play WoW together. In expansion after expansion Janka would be there with me as I explored this virtual world – we did dungeons together, battlegrounds, raids… craft materials for one another and became real friends – even though we’d never met. I even met her husband Cameron playing WoW. That was true of a lot of my WoW friends.

    Through WoW and Facebook I got to know more and more about Jana and I’d see photos of her animals (she’s a dog and cat lover and has this huge heart) and stories about the crazy things they’d do. I found out about her job and what she does for a living. WoW helped me make a virtual friend a real life friend and I’m thankful to WoW for all the friends I made there. Time and again Jana would lend me virtual gold (not of any real value in the real world) for virtual items that seemed important back then… other things are more important you find out.

    Here’s the rub…

    Jana was recently diagnosed with uterine cancer, something the two of us can’t fight off in the land of Azeroth.

    Because of circumstances in her and her husband’s life they do not have health insurance and the fight for Jana is just now beginning. Here’s a quote from her husbands blog:

    “My research indicates that treatment of uterine cancer often runs about $100,000. Fortunately, MUSC offers patient assistance. We have applied for it and should hear back early next week if we are approved and to what extent. If approved, our costs could run anywhere from $4,000-$10,000. A ridiculous amount of money, but FAR better than the alternative!”

    That’s an awful lot of money to raise just to have a chance at beating this thing. I want to help but I can’t do this alone and neither can Jana. I have faith in the people who I call friends in the world – whether I’ve met them on WoW, Facebook or even – gasp – in person that we can help Jana raise this money and fight.

    I want your help and you can do this by following these steps:

    1. Go read Jana’s husbands blog about what’s been going on so far (here is the link: http://cameronscottwright.wordpress.com )

    2. Share that blog with your Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Reddit … friends (it’s called social networking for a reason)

    3. Lastly, you can donate towards her cancer fund – if you can give $5 that would help… if all of my friends gave $5 she’d have the money to do this (click here to donate: PayPal )

    When I have friends ask me to help them raise funds for dogs, running a race or their son or daughters school charity I give what I can if I can. It’s the right thing to do. Today I want to raise money to help a human (she’s really an orc) fight to stay alive… can you help me do that? Someday soon maybe people wont have to raise money to have a chance at staying alive – but at the moment we still do.

    My friend Jana (or Janka as she’ll always be known to me) needs help – I’m hoping you can help me help her.

  • Misreading People

    I’m not very good at reading people I guess. Recently two things happened that I didn’t expect based on how a person reacted with me.

    When I interviewed for my current job in Arizona I did video (Skype) interviews and on more than one occasion my interviewer (now one of my bosses) leaned away from the camera and crossed her arms – I thought for sure she didn’t want me to have the job. Having been on this job for a couple of months now I see that she does that in all kinds of different circumstances and I’m not sure why.

    Saturday afternoon I had a date and I told the guy he was handsome – he didn’t respond… I’m like WTF am I hideous? Then later he did the same thing as my boss – he leaned away from me and crossed his arms and I thought it was over… five minutes later he invited me to his house to go swimming and the rest is censored… 😉

    I think its easy to look at something and see something that isn’t true at all about it, I should know better. I’ll have to judge people based on their actual actions not just their body language in any given situation.

    On a side note a woman on the sober bowling league last week pulled me aside and said: You’re gay aren’t you.

    I wasn’t even wearing a rainbow shirt or anything… but yes, I told her – I’m gay. I think she and I will become friends over time here, she’s crazy and that’s the type of friend I tend to attract (no offense intended if you’re a friend reading this… but honestly… your crazy 😀 )

    I’ve had a couple of dates here and only one that I really enjoyed. I will continue to have dates and see if there is anyone I like enough to see more than a few times but I don’t have any expectations.

     

  • The Journey Continues…

    My friend Jana was diagnosed with cancer and needs help – please read the article and help if you can. Please also repost.

    cameronscottwright's avatarA Cancer Journey & Plea for Aid

    Update!

    We just heard from MUSC, and are going to have to reschedule Jana’s mammogram as the Hollings Cancer Centre at MUSC wants to see her tomorrow morning at 10am. (Let us, for the nonce, assume it is a matter of good service as opposed to something to worry about!).

    The consultation should hopefully let us know what tests will be needed and how much they might cost (or at least what test are needed).

    In terms of patient assistance, MUSC is literally a life-saver! We have been approved for the maximum patient assistance! <pauses for cheers> We will need to pay the surgeon $1,500, pay $80 per office visit, and pay the complete costs for any tests (plus any follow-up treatments, medications, or visits, of course).

    So my lower estimate of $4,000 will hopefully be closer than the higher estimate of $10,000 or more (depending on the tests’ costs)…

    View original post 80 more words

  • summa cum laude

    Today something very special is happening – my best friend Suzanne is graduating Summa Cum Laude.

    I had to look up Summa Cum Laude to know what it meant  and I found the following:

    “with highest honor”

    or

    “with highest distinction”

    I’m incredibly proud of her. There were times when she was studying and struggling when she’d think about dropping a class or doubt herself. But I never doubted her, I’ve seen  her overcome some really big things in life and I knew a little thing like school couldn’t stand in her way.

    She is my example time and time again of what I could strive to be if I push myself hard and don’t give up. When I’m about to give up I think of her and know she’d solider on.

    I regret that I can’t be there today to see it – I wish I could because I know she’s be beaming that bright smile and radiating that happiness she takes with her everywhere…

    Suzanne, congratulations – I’m so very proud of you and will be thinking of you all day long.

    Love

    Jamez

  • Adjustments

    May already, wow how times flies.

    Having to drive every day is a big change from life in Washington DC where I could walk or Metro almost anywhere. The morning commute is pretty easy and relaxed, my work day starts at 7:30 (so I’m there by 7:15) and traffic is still pretty light that early. In the afternoon I get done at 4:00 and that traffic is pretty heavy. I manage to avoid freeways and my commute home is a little over 20 minutes, the way to work is about 15. Buses, at least on Thomas Road don’t always have pull offs and more often than not just sit there at the stop they arrive at until they’re supposed to leave… unlike DC buses which depart seconds after arriving and loading… so it blocks up some of the traffic.

    Everyone here speeds, I know everyone every where speeds… but here its extreme to me anyway. 50 in the 35 zone is typical, most people do at least 10 miles over the limit and it gives me issues 🙂 I usually just go along at the speed limit but sometimes I can just sense how annoying I am to others and go faster, they still pass me. I brought up the speeding thing to my insurance agent and she said “the speed limit is just a suggestion.” Really…

    I have finally stopped waking up at 3:00 a.m. and just lying there in the dark… now it’s about 4:15 or so that I wake up… but that’s a whole lot better really and I feel like I have extra energy and am less tired.

    I’ve found some good AA meetings here, well at the moment I think they’re good… One is a traveling Big Book meeting that goes from house to house and I was all excited about it – until I came and they were reading the stories in the back… /sigh. The other two are Big Book meetings also, one follows along to the Joe and Charlie CD for 15 minutes and then discusses what they heard and relates, mostly they stay on topic, but there is a lot of new or recycled sobriety here and not that many folks yet that have over 5 years. The other is a step meeting, big meeting – reminds me a bit of Pacific (the size and personalities) and Northside (the literature aspect and traditions), the lead shares their experience strength and hope but can only use the Big Book for reference… I’ve only been to the Step 8 and 9 meeting so far… I wonder how Step 6 and 7 did… we’ll see next round. Every meeting I’ve been to here I hear the Traditions read and it sounds like such a simple thing… but it makes me feel better.

    I haven’t done too much “fun stuff” outside of work or AA… but there is a new Sober Bowling group starting and I’m going to try that. I’ll be seeing Iron Man this weekend and I’m looking forward to the Comic Con here at the end of the month. Next weekend I’m going to a baseball game for work.

    So far, I’m pretty happy with moving here… I know summer is coming but so far the weather has been spectacular.

    Love and miss friends and family, but happy to be here.

  • One Week in Phoenix

    I arrived in Phoenix a week ago today and all seems to be going well. The weather has been really nice mid 70s – 90s and all of it comfortable heat – everyone keeps telling me I’ll wish I had never moved her in the summer.

    My one bedroom apartment is really all that I need and moving in means I had to do some shopping. I’d go buy all the important things like the shower curtain and liner and not realize until I arrived home that I forgot the shower curtain rings and i’d run out again to get those and remember a slew of other things too. At this moment I think I have almost everything I need – maybe I could use a frying pan and a spatula… but I’ll be ok for a good while. For the first few days I didn’t do a lot outside of shopping, eating and driving around – oh, and I tanned by the pool every day, which is really a nice thing to be able to do.

    Everything is cheaper here – except gas. It’s an amazing concept, but when people make less money they have to sell things for less i guess.

    I didn’t have my Passport, which I need to get an AZ license, until yesterday (I shipped it UPS instead of taking it with me like a doofus) so I don’t have that yet. I do have a nice car that is quiet and gets me from A – Z very well. The amount of emails I’m getting now from Allstate and  VW makes me wish I had stayed carless. I’m sure I’ll figure out the settings for that soon.

    I tried out two meetings so far, one on Thursday night and one on Sunday. Each had things that I liked about it and each had things I didn’t – the Thursday night step study was the winner so far, I plan to keep looking but that one is close and the people friendly.

    Monday was the first day of work so of course I didn’t sleep well. I was at work at 7:00 – a 15 minute car ride and my day starts at 7:30 there. The boss and the other new person were there to meet me and they showed us the ropes of how to open up (making coffee, drawing drapes, turning on the printer) and before you knew it we were taking notes in the board meeting. To be honest I didn’t take many notes I was really interested in what they were talking about. For lunch the boss got us tacos and burritos. The day went by really fast and before I knew it it was quitting time – 4:00 p.m. It had been a really great day and then I checked my voicemail (See this story).  So it was an up and down day mostly up.

    My Desk at Work
    My Desk at Work

    Tuesday I spent good quality time with my boss going over how I’m going to help her – she’s never had an assistant before and she’s excited and wary about it. I put some of those cares to rest right away by giving here items that she had been expecting but didn’t ask me for and then pointed out three errors on the website and in email signatures that should be addressed ASAP. They said the appreciated it I hope so I was only trying to help and get used to everything.

    Wednesday, today I started to discover how unorganized the office is – there are all kinds of documents in the “Forms” folder that don’t resemble forms at all and the “Inventory” folder has mostly letters about events. *sigh* Well at least I wont be bored.

    My protector at work
    My protector at work

    As it stands today I’m pretty happy here in AZ. I know the weather will change and the job will get incredibly busy in the summer – but i’m ready.

  • Donnell and Superman

    From 2000 – 2005 I worked at Children’s National Medical Center in a few departments that focused on HIV/AIDS. I don’t do hospitals well, I’m squeamish (see this story) but working behind a computer is easy regardless of where the computer is so it wasn’t an issue as long as I didn’t have to look at tubes and blood and stuff… ewww.

    One of the nurses I worked with, Christy, had been working with one particular kid since he was born. His name was Donnell and he was born with HIV. Donnell was around 7 years old the first time I met him. He had come up to our floor with the purpose of seeing Christy and peeked his head around the corner of my cubicle shyly and then ran away, he was soon back and played with the Superman toys I had on my desk, but he was very shy. At that time I still had some hair – I know hard to believe – and I was wearing thick framed glasses in a Clark Kent style. Donnell convinced himself that I was really Superman. I think back then he honestly believed it and who was I to deny a kid a dream.

    Every time Donnell came to the hospital he would ask his nurse, Ms Campbell, if he could see Superman and I would drop whatever I was doing and spend hours with that little boy. We’d run up and down the hallways and visit strange areas and he’s always ask me when I would take him flying. I… sorry it’s hard to think about. He was always so happy to see me and he became a bright spot in my every day life.

    Donnell called me Superman and other people started to call me Superman and that’s why I decided on the Superman tattoo I had done when I turned 10 years sober in 2004. Donnell thought it was pretty cool when I showed it too him and it still is today when I look at it.

    He invited me a few years later to his graduation from elementary school (I think) and I was a little wary about going to Anacostia but I did anyway. He ran up to me and gave me the biggest hug that day and it was so cool to see him all dressed up and progressing. I was always asking him about school and trying to encourage him to study and try harder – emphasizing the importance of a good education, even if it was boring.

    I usually go to Ft Lauderdale for my birthday in December but the year I didn’t I was in the hospital when Donnell came to the emergency room. I went to spend the day with him while they tried to figure out what was wrong. Turns out he had a brain tumor the size of a small orange in his head and they had to operate. I was with him and his family up until they took him into surgery. It was so scary, I remember being a big teary mess that day too. In spite of my squeamishness I visited him in his room every day until he was released, I even came in on a Saturday.

    When I left Childrens I lost touch with Donnell, I would hear once in a while from friends that they had seen him at the hospital, but I myself hadn’t seen him since then. I often wondered how he was doing and if he had gotten into college yet.

    Today he suffered a stroke, his mom found him and they resuscitated him twice before letting him go. I hear he had been doing really well on his medications and the future looked bright.

    I’ve cried a few times tonight about this, a lot about time lost because I was too busy to stay in touch. A lot because he was such a good kid and he loved so many people with such a big heart.

    Mostly today I wish I had been able to fly and give him that one thing – maybe now he can fly. Maybe now he has wings – if you believe that type of thing, and I”m not sure I do – if there is one man who deserves to fly it’s him… I’ll miss you Donnell, thank you for loving me .

  • Leaving Pussy Behind

    In thinking about moving to the other side of the country the thought of my cat Mouse came up frequently. On a previous move just a few hours away she was traumatized and never felt safe in the new apartment. I wasn’t sure how she’d do on a plane or a car across the country.

    So I asked the roommate how he felt about keeping the kitty and he has agreed – she loves him and he her so it works out. He spoils her with salmon and shrimp from his own plate on occasions.

    So I decided to leave her here and I’m sad about that. IMG_2107

  • Confession of a Horde Player

    On World of Warcraft I play a proud member of the Horde Noq, an undead mage from the world of Azeroth. He’s been around for a few years now and seen all the wonders of the world – he’s even been to Outland where the squid faced (Draenei) and Blood Elves originate.  He’s helped take down the likes of Onyxia and the Lich King along side his guild Hammer of the Ancients or his friends in This Is Mana Tap. He is well known on his server, has a sharp tongue and a wicked staff (that could be code!).

    But I have a deep dark secret…

    I… I… I like gnomes. They’re so cute and funny and make me want to just scoop them up in my arms and cuddle them. They have the cutest dance of all the dance moves in the game

    Gnome_male250x

    I actually try to emulate this dance when I go out dancing – I mean the hips, the slapping the hand behind the head it’s just perfect!

    My Horde friends like to talk about gnome cookies (made out of real gnomes) and punting them across the Barrens. Some of my Horde friends are undead and would readily eat these cute little buggers, but not I.

    I love playing them as mages and rogues and priests – as soon as we were able to play priests on gnome characters I ran out and rolled a new priests (sadly this means I have two active priests) and simply love it. I love their emotes of /train and /charge and of course dance.

    *sigh* I love Gnomes.

    I also love dwarves (much too tough of a meat for most Horde to consider eating) they’re so furry and have great beards and I imagine furry chests (I can’t see em naked – I know that’s  a little pervy, but hey it’s me). They also have great emotes – you simply cannot believe how much I literally laugh out loud as I /rasp over and over on a Dwarf. Their flirts are pretty awesome too.

    *sigh* I love Dwarves

    I care not one bit for any of the other Alliance races and they can be thrown into a pit of red dragons for all I care.

    But all of my friends love Horde, all of them!!! Kerrig the Orc, Salthair the Undead, Janka the Orc, Landrai and Luesarim the Blood Elves, I even know Trolls… /gasp .

    So I play with my friends as a Horde but each day I secretly dream of a day when Gnomish or Goblin Engineering creates a device that would permanently grant my Horde players the appearance of gnomes and dwarves, with emotes and all. Maybe some day Blizzard will break down the barriers of racism and allow my gnomes and dwarves to switch factions, I’m sure that all the Horde leaders would benefit from daily hugs given by gnomes.

    There, I’ve come out and said it, I’m a gnome lover a dwarf lover and long to scream out during raid encounters “For Gnomeregan!!!”

  • My Appendix

    I had my appendix taken out on Tuesday night at Washington Hospital Center, I feel much better already.

    Sunday night, January 6, 2013 as I sat on my bed to go to sleep i felt a weird twinge in my belly area – just found it weird, didn’t think about it too much and went to sleep.

    Monday my stomach/side ached most of the day. Nothing to keep me from work or anything, just annoying. It did actually start to hurt more and more as the day went by. I ate a couple times, hoping that would help, and actually didn’t have dinner wasn’t hungry. I was just over the whole achy thing and went to bed around 9:30.

    At around 12:30 I woke up to extreme pain in my right side – I went to the toilet, hoping maybe I just had gas or something, but I couldn’t go. After a few minutes of the pain not going away and the feeling of nausea a couple times I called the Kaiser advice nurse and explained what was going on – she advised me to call 911.

    I called 911 and within five minutes and ambulance arrived in our parking lot. I didn’t know if I was to go out there or if they were to come into my house so I just sat here. They came in and said ok lets go, lol. They took my vitals – I was pretty freaked out not only because of the pain but being in an ambulance really isn’t a fun idea to me and the paramedic guy kept asking me to calm down but it was hopeless. They called in to dispatch and dispatch directed them to Howard University Hospital (HUH). On the way to Howard the Paramedic told me I’d be better off going to Washington Hospital Center (WHC), but they had to go where dispatch sent them.

    At Howard I filled out a simple form and the paramedic told me I could call a taxi and go to WHC if I was waiting to long, he really wanted me to do that – I should have listened I guess. I arrived at HUH around 1:00 sat in the waiting room for 1 1/2 hours and then in a hallway for 2 more hours and had only peed in a cup and given blood. It was around 5:30 when I finally got a bed in a hallway in the ER and another hour or so before anyone came to look at me. I kept whispering “just come fix me, just come fix me” over and over again as I wanted to no longer be in pain so badly. At the shift change I think I finally started to get help a nurse gave me pain medication – I felt very loopy. They gave me an IV for the cat scan or the X-ray machine.

    The results of the cat scan said I didn’t have appendicitis but they were going to ask for a surgery consult just in case – the surgery consult guy was right behind him and came over to examine me – honestly I think it was the first doctor to touch me during this whole time and it was around 9:00 a.m. He was so super sexy, bearded, furry chest hairs peeking through his shirt collar and he was almost positive I had “early appendicitis” and said we’d be having surgery.

    Ana came to visit while I was there, that was nice. I felt like I had been there forever by that point.

    As I have Kaiser insurance they had to get approval to do the surgery there, but that didn’t happen and there were orders to send me to WHC that was around 10:30 a.m. I sat and waited until 2:00 before I was transferred via ambulance. Did you know there are speed bumps on the way to WHC ER? Isn’t that a sweet thing to do to people that are in pain already? geez!

    At WHC I was put in a temporary room for a few hours until they got my permanent room ready. We had a small problem with medications for me, I was in pain again but my SSN kept coming up as James J. Appel and they wanted to make sure I was who I said I was… I think it was 2 hours before I received pain medication at WHC and then they moved me to my permanent room. My permanent room I shared with a 80 year old man who’d never been in a hospital before that he knew of, nice quiet guy. My friend Donna came to visit from CNMC, that was very nice too.

    They started prepping me for surgery around 6 or something. Antibiotic IVs, fluids, pain meds – I should mention they wouldn’t let me eat or drink anything since I got there, I wasn’t hungry but I was very thirsty.

    They rolled me away to the surgery area around 7:30 and I met the people who put you under, they were in good spirits and seemed like nice folks. They asked me about ever having surgery before and I explained that I had lazy eye surgery as a kid and threw up after on my parents – who had tried to feed me McDonalds so really it was their own fault.

    The Operating room was really very cool to look at I loved the look of the lights and the tech they had in there. I kept trying to breathe deeply and my eyes closed when I’d start to think about what was about to happen. I thought someone was pushing my socks up but she was really attaching something that massaged my legs – that was very nice, but honestly freaked me out when it first started. I remember them putting the oxygen on my face but I don’t recall anyone asking me to count backwards or anythings.

    I woke up and needed to pee and cough and I hurt – and I said all those things and wanted to roll over on my side and they kept saying “no, it’s ok, just stay still” and the feeling that I wanted to pee was apparently the catheter. Then nothing.

    Then I was awakened by a BEEP, BEEP, BEEP and I looking around and was in a new room and someone said I was in the recovery room and I tried to go back to sleep and then BEEP, BEEP, BEEP and again and again… apparently I wasn’t getting enough oxygen and the beeping was to get me to breathe deeper – I made an audible complaint that that was pretty rude thing to do after all I’d been through all I wanted to do was sleep – she laughed at me.

    It wasn’t long before they rolled me back up to my room – 12:30 I was in my own bed. I would fall asleep and they’d come to take vitals or to change my IV or to annoy me. There is very little sleep to be had in the hospital bed – I felt sorry for my roommate.

    They had given me a urinal to pee in while I was in the bed, but nothing I could do would allow urine to flow into that thing in a bed – I tried and tried and tried and nothing. So I got them to let me walk to the bathroom and then there was joyful release! Being hooked up to the IV machine made it difficult to go to the bathroom solo – and I’d press the button for help and they’d say they’d be right there and I’d wait and wait and wait… honestly, Gary Jim and Ana were there during a few of these encounters and actually went off to find someone to help me. Pushing the button was a pointless endeavor the longer I was there the more I realized that. I was really surprised the bathroom didn’t have any grab bars.

    I spent most of the day in and out of consciousness that really coordinated with the pain meds. They wanted me to walk and pass gas so I walked as soon as I could. The passing gas didn’t happen until right before I went home but it did happen – I’ve since pooed too if you were wondering.

    I arrived home last night, Gary came to get me and went to get me medications too. Mouse was happy to see me but not sure why I didn’t pick her up for a hug or play our nightly game. Gary sent me this email while I was still in the hospital:

    “Mouser and I were talking.  I told her you were in the hospital to have surgery and she said that she was in the hospital twice for surgery but no one came to visit her.  She said that when you come home that I should put one of those hoods (he’s referring to the cone of shame) on you like you made her wear and handcuff you so you cannot touch yourself.”

    Standing up, getting up, sitting down all those things currently hurt a little bit. I can sit here and type and have basically no pain at all. Oh and coughing hurts a little too. I have three little bandages on my belly and they shave most of that area, but not all of it so it looks like half of my belly is dirty and it’s going to really itch soon I know it!

    I don’t know if it would have taken less time to just take a cab to WHC when I first got to HUH or not but I think if I ever end up in a similar situation I would go to WHC first.

    There was an outpouring of love and comments and text from friends and family that I truly appreciated – but all of you that kept wanting me to keep you updated with calls or text used up my phone battery that much sooner – thanks! lol