On World of Warcraft I play a proud member of the Horde Noq, an undead mage from the world of Azeroth. He’s been around for a few years now and seen all the wonders of the world – he’s even been to Outland where the squid faced (Draenei) and Blood Elves originate.  He’s helped take down the likes of Onyxia and the Lich King along side his guild Hammer of the Ancients or his friends in This Is Mana Tap. He is well known on his server, has a sharp tongue and a wicked staff (that could be code!).

But I have a deep dark secret…

I… I… I like gnomes. They’re so cute and funny and make me want to just scoop them up in my arms and cuddle them. They have the cutest dance of all the dance moves in the game

I actually try to emulate this dance when I go out dancing – I mean the hips, the slapping the hand behind the head it’s just perfect!

My Horde friends like to talk about gnome cookies (made out of real gnomes) and punting them across the Barrens. Some of my Horde friends are undead and would readily eat these cute little buggers, but not I.

I love playing them as mages and rogues and priests – as soon as we were able to play priests on gnome characters I ran out and rolled a new priests (sadly this means I have two active priests) and simply love it. I love their emotes of /train and /charge and of course dance.

*sigh* I love Gnomes.

I also love dwarves (much too tough of a meat for most Horde to consider eating) they’re so furry and have great beards and I imagine furry chests (I can’t see em naked – I know that’s  a little pervy, but hey it’s me). They also have great emotes – you simply cannot believe how much I literally laugh out loud as I /rasp over and over on a Dwarf. Their flirts are pretty awesome too.

*sigh* I love Dwarves

I care not one bit for any of the other Alliance races and they can be thrown into a pit of red dragons for all I care.

But all of my friends love Horde, all of them!!! Kerrig the Orc, Salthair the Undead, Janka the Orc, Landrai and Luesarim the Blood Elves, I even know Trolls… /gasp .

So I play with my friends as a Horde but each day I secretly dream of a day when Gnomish or Goblin Engineering creates a device that would permanently grant my Horde players the appearance of gnomes and dwarves, with emotes and all. Maybe some day Blizzard will break down the barriers of racism and allow my gnomes and dwarves to switch factions, I’m sure that all the Horde leaders would benefit from daily hugs given by gnomes.

There, I’ve come out and said it, I’m a gnome lover a dwarf lover and long to scream out during raid encounters “For Gnomeregan!!!”