Book of Jamez

55 y/o malcontent, something of a writer

Category: Family

  • Suzanne's Wedding

    I’m not a fan of beaches, nor of driving anywhere for 2 or three hours, or of screaming babies on airplanes. But for your best friend, you do things you wouldn’t necessarily do for other people. That’s why I could be found on Tuesday September 8th at BWI waiting for a flight to Norfolk, VA.

    Suzanne’s Dad, Chip, planned to pick me up and drive me down to Hatteras (Salvo actually I guess) which saved me from having to rent a car and drive down there myself. I was surprised to find Suzanne’s brother-in-law, Jerry, at BWI and we rode next to one another on the very turbulent plane ride to Norfolk. I hadn’t seen Jerry in probably 10 years or more, but when I lived in Eau Claire he was a regular part of my social network.

    The ride down to Hatteras was drowned out in rain, we were afraid the wedding day might have dampened spirits – yet when we arrived it was sunny with a slight wind.

    The house was a huge thing, like most of the houses that I saw down there. We were greeted by Suzanne’s Mom, Judy, her sister Eileen, niece Paris, friend… who’s name I couldn’t tell you how to spell, and of course Farley the slobbering bulldog.

    It was a relatively slow, relaxing night, we did check out the beach where the ceremony was to be and talked about the upcoming stuff. We did have a lot of fun, silly stories; silly fathers (Jerry) helping their daughters cheat at cards against little old me.

    Wednesday, 9/9/09, Suzanne and I had a nice quiet morning reading AA literature, sipping coffee and talking about the program. The women all left to get their hair done and Jerry and I were left to pick up the house. Later we were sent on a mission to get more flowers, which we did finally find.

    I’ve known Suzanne a very long time, I’ve seen her at special events before, I’ve seen her holding puppies all full of love, but truthfully, I think she looked the most beautiful in her dress on Wednesday, it wasn’t the dress, it wasn’t the hair – she was just glowing with happiness.

    Her man, Paul, showed up with his father around 2 and quickly go into his military dress whites. He was looking pretty sharp. I will let you know that he’s not perfect, he doesn’t like coffee… so he has at least one flaw.

    The ceremony was short and beautiful. The dinner as well.

    I was glad to head home the next morning, but glad that I had the opportunity to spend time with all the folks that I hadn’t seen in a few years as well as Suzanne and Paul.

  • What's in a Name?

    I was born as James Jody _____. Phillip _________, my biological father was the star football player in Blair, WI and my biological Mother Cheryl ___________ and he hooked up and had my sister and then me for children. Both Phillip and Cheryl were alcoholics and you can guess how the marriage went. My biological mother always told the story of how Phillip would drink up all the money and her mother would have to bring us food as babies.

    In 1974 (give or take a year) my biological mother met and married Joseph __________, who adopted me and my sister – we took his last name. Joe was/is also an alcoholic.

    Joe was a violent drunk who beat my mother bloody regularly. His family helped him beat her on a few occasions. One fathers day on our way home from somewhere he was arrested for some warrant. He was a lot of things, but he was never my father.

    When I was thirteen and again at 15 I met my biological father. He was kind enough to get me drunk both times, offered to get me a hooker so I would lose my virginity and denounced my mothers tales of his drinking as her excuses.

    In 1986 at the age of 15 I was put into the Foster Home system. I was placed in the home I’ve stated before that Ma was sitting in a rocking chair knitting and Pa was sitting in his rocker – they were both very old (I was 15) and I knew it would never be a lasting placement, there was no way these old people could keep up with me nor manage me. Yet that’s exactly what they did. My Ma and Pa fed me regularly, loved me constantly and even made me be responsible for my own actions.

    My Pa was the first human adult male that loved me regardless of who I was or what I had done. He didn’t want anything in return, he just wanted to love me. When I did something wrong I could see actual disappointment in his eyes, I could see concern – these were things that were foreign to me.

    At around 20 my biological father died from complications of diabetes – alcohol became more important than insulin – that’s a serious complication.

    When I sobered up I made amends to my biological father by regularly going to his grave and cleaning it up and I talk to him. But he’s not really my father.

    I also managed to see my adopted father Joe at a bar (I had a legitimate reason for being there) and made as much of an amend that I might have needed to make. But he’s also never been my father.

    My Pa, was from the first day he met me up until the day he died in November of last year, my father.

    This is just a brief few words explaining what’s been going on in my head since before Pa died last year, but it will possibly help you to understand why I’m taking his name as part of mine.

    If all goes according to plan my name will change to honor Pa before October 1, 2009.

    I’ll keep you posted and thank you for your understanding.

  • The Auction (Trip to WI Part 3)

    I think that a little background information might be appropriate here so bear with me if you’ve heard some of this before.

    My Pa died in November of 2008, but before he died he managed to get to as many auctions as he could within driving distance (8 hours probably wouldn’t have been too far to drive for an auction for him) where he proceeded to buy items. Usually the items that Pa would buy would be mowers, snoblowers, engines for such – but sometimes the items he bought were a little more exotic. I know that he had a set of street lights, the kind that you would see on a city street, well maybe a small town street. After my Pa would buy these items he would take them to his “Shop” which he bought 9 years ago, the “Shop” used to be owned by a lumber company (it was huge: at least 3 floors and a basement area, there are little cubby hole type places all over that can only be reached by small sets of stairs – HUGE).

    Anyone in the family that would ask about what he might want to do with these items would be given any one of a standard litany of responses: “Don’t you worry about it.” or “I’ve got plans for that” or “That’s none of your business” among other things. But every once in a while he would chuckle at the prospect of us all having to clean it up after he was gone.

    So, since it warmed up in WI in late March my sister Rhonda took charge of the task and we started to prepare for the auctions. We originally planned to have three auctions (and in hindsight I really wish we would have had three) but dropped it down to two after the first auction was so successful. Rhonda, being the only one of us that lives close to Ma and the shop, spent almost every day down at the shop with her husband, or Ma going through the place and determining what was what. I understand that we threw away over 7 long dumpsters full of items (Pa did have notes on SOME items that said: “for Parts” or “unrepairable”). I managed to get home in March, May, June and July to help and I know my brother Kenny who lives closer was home a few more times that I was bur primarily Rhonda did the bulk of the work.

    I knew what I was in for this trip to WI, the last trip about wore me out so I knew I’d be busy. We would wake up each morning about 6 head for breakfast at the Garden of Eatin’ before heading to the shop. It’s dirty, hard, endless work down there and after even an hour or two you wonder if it’ll ever be over (my sister did this every day for a quite a while and I’m very proud of her). At 12 the sirens for town go off and we’d head for Ma’s for a quick lunch before heading back down to the shop for the remainder of the day. Around 6 Ma would have dinner ready at home and we’d all chow down and moan alot (sore muscles).

    We did get some help while we were down there working. Greg’s dad was down each day helping out, Ma’s nephew Byron was down a few days and really worked up a sweat, there was an annoying kid named Michael who just wouldn’t shut up but he helped so I didn’t pummel him.

    The last two days leading up to the auction we began to see the light at the end of the tunnel, items were strategically placed outside and throughout the building in such a way that hundreds of people could safely walk through and get a look at them. We worked from early in the morning to late in the evening, nerves frayed, tempers tested and nephews absent.

    The day of the auction had finally arrived. We spent about three hours before the auction taking a few remaining items out of the building and into the lot, we also moved a million items that belonged to one or the other of the nephews into the back of pickup trucks and cars. The stage was set and soon all the players started to arrive the auctioneer’s were there and soon the lot filled with old men in various stages of disarray (there apparently are no dress code suggestions for an auction, it’s come as you are).

    This might have seemed to be the longest day the auction started at 9:30 a.m. and continued on until around 6:00 p.m. And for the most part we all just kind of stood around and waited. Every once in a while one of the auctioneer’s would need something and we would take care of that but mostly, we just stood around and waited.

    My nephews, brother, and brother-in-law all bid on things and won them. I didn’t see anything that I wanted to bid on that I could fit in my luggage so I just let those items go… yes, sarcasm.

    Almost every item was bid on, not as much as we had hoped, but some. The building was sold around 1:30 to the highest bidder at less than half of what Pa had paid for it 9 years ago – the new owner has pipe dreams that were reminiscent of Pa’s pipe dreams and I wish him luck. The winners of the bids had 2 full days to retrieve their items or they would become property of the new owners – I hope they managed to do so.

    That night we ordered pizza and sat around the kitchen table talking about the events of the day, month and year. We joked and kidded and old resentments flared up and new jokes and stories were born.

    It’s nice to go home and see my family, it’s nice to spend time with them… but I’d rather never ever prepare for auctions like this again. But if my Ma or Rhonda asks for help, I’ll do what I can to be there for them, they’ve always been there for me.

  • Trip to the Midwest July 2009 Part 1

    Why am I here again? I’ve been to WI 6 or 7 times in the last year, yet I am there again… Well, I was asked to speak at the Chippewa Valley Roundup this year. This is the 12th Annual Chippewa Valley Roundup, and a little more than 12 years ago I was actually part of the organizing committee for the roundup, that was before a resentment or two kicked in.

    I landed in MSP on Wednesday afternoon and shortly after my arrival I entered the shuttle van that would deliver me to Eau Claire. All the way to Eau Claire there were a multitude of state troopers that were pulling over several RVs, buses and cars – I had never seen that many police on the road from MSP to Eau Claire before.

    Immediately upon arrival in Eau Claire Pat and I headed to Taco Johns for a quick meal. We took that as an opportunity to catch up a bit and I got to hear about their hopes to become parents to a foreign exchange student from Thailand.

    When we arrived in Chippewa Falls we were greeted by Brenda and Maui (the dog) and had a nice little time chatting. It wasn’t long before the night time caught up with us and we were all headed for bed.

    Thursday morning the entire Isenberger family headed off for work and I was free to waste time as I saw fit. I headed over to Arby’s for a very late breakfast (roast beef sandwhich) and then that afternoon I drove Sami (I call her Sam just to annoy her) to Oakwood Mall. I had my earring cleaned and then she and I had lunch (I eat a lot in WI) in the food court. We then headed to Banbury Place (former home of the Uniroyal plant) and picked up Brenda.

    I was the only one interested in going to the Pacific Group that night and I wasn’t sure if my sponsor would make it or not, but lo and behold he arrived with 15 minutes to spare before the meeting. My friend and former sponsee Jon S spoke at the meeting and it was nice to see all the old friends and to be a part of the meeting. I also had a chance to meet Jim H the Saturday night speaker at the roundup. After the meeting Steve and I joined the guys for food at Perkin’s a local tradition here.

    Steve and I headed for Chippewa Falls where Pat was waiting up for us – at this point it was likely close to 11:00 central time and I imagine Steve was tired, but Pat, Steve and I stayed up talking for quite a while.

    Friday morning we took Steve for a small tour of the area which included Taco John’s and the Oakwood Mall area. When we arrived back in Chippewa Steve and I loaded up his car with my bags and he dropped me off at the hotel. I was hoping for a nap.

    However, not too long after I closed my eyes, Bruce E called and said he was on his way up to my room with goodies. True to his word, he and another AA showed up soon enough with a bunch of food items for me, the speaker. It was nice, but a real nap would have been nicer.

    So, having been awoken I headed downstairs to grab my registration badge and other items that the committee had prepared for me. I was told almost immediately that I had just missed seeing my friend Renata who had come down from MSP to see me.

    I went back up to my room, took a nice shower (though the shower did make a whistling sound the whole time – I’m not THAT cute) and shaved my head. I took the time to look at the Big Book and say a few prayers that I thought might be helpful to me that day before heading down to have dinner with my host, the other speakers and some committee members.

    Dinner was… well, the bread pudding was good and the conversation was good, that’s about it.

    There was quite a lot of fellowship before the meeting and I was lucky enough to be able to see most of my friends before I had to speak.

    I wasn’t nervous, I wasn’t scared I was fine. I stood up there and listened to them read How It Works, The Traditions, and then had Dr. Larry introduce me. Then I read a small part of the Big Book, the part about us being sensitive and then just started talking. I really have no idea what I said, I recall talking about my Pa, but that’s about it, that’s pretty standard for me when I talk.

    After the talk most of the people lined up and shook my hand or gave me a hug. Many of them said I did a great job, and I hope I did… I guess I should listen to the CD sometime.

  • The Exchange

    I’ve been friends with Pat and Brenda for almost 15 years. During that 15 years I have watched their children grow up from 4 year old terrors to adults with responsibilities that they take seriously. It has been a pleasure to watch.

    For the last few years the Pat and Brenda have been looking forward to the day when their children would be away from the house and they would effectively be free. I must admit that I too was looking forward to the day when we would be able to have more freedom to do what we wanted to without worrying about the kids at home.

    So it came as a little bit of a shock when I came to Chippewa Falls this week and found out they were very excited about a foreign exchange student coming to their home in the next few weeks.

    I really shouldn’t be surprised. They have such big hearts and so much to share with someone from another country. They’ve always given to others.

    For the next school year a young lady from Thailand will be living at my friends house and perhaps even coming to Washington DC in October for a brief visit. I hope she comes to love my friends as much as I love them, and I hope they come to learn a lot about other cultures.

  • WIsconsin Trip – Summer 2009 – part 2 (Coulee Region)

    First a little background information. Coulee “in Wisconsin, they are the product of nearly a half million years of erosion, unmodified by glaciation. The loose rocks at the base of the wall form what are called scree slopes. These are formed when chunks of the canyon wall give way in a rockslide. Left alone, the valleys are often woodland, with the ridgetops transitioning into tallgrass prairie when not turned into pasture or used for row crops.” I always think of coulee’s like big spacious valleys, I’m not sure if that’s accurate, but when I think of “coulees” in WI I think of valleys of lush green forests and rolling hills.

    I awoke relatively early on Sunday morning and after saying my farewells to the Isenberger’s I headed off for Galesville.

    A little more information – My Pa, who died in November loved to go to auctions. He would go to auctions and buy anything that struck his fancy – lawn mowers, snow blowers, tables, street lamps, old books, clothes, motors… relatively ANYTHING. And he managed to fill the old Beaver Builder’s building in Galesville (over 300′ long with 4 floors) with those items he purchased. This is what my Pa did after he retired, much to the occasional frustration and frequent concern for finances that he caused my Ma. It’s hard to put into words what the Shop looks like inside, Pa had no recognizable form of organization we might have a stack of riding mower decks in this corner, at the far side of the building and behind a row of snow blowers. The vast expanse of the building have allowed many bats and stray cats to call it home and therefore there are various forms of feces in different parts. It was rare that Pa would cover items with a tarp or put them in a protected place, most if not all of the items in the shop are covered with a thin layer of black dust that gets transferred to your face, hands and clothes with ease.

    I arrived in Galesville a little after 10, having just missed my Ma who was off to a 50th wedding anniversary party for old friends. I headed off immediately to the Shop to go to work. Rhonda, her husband Greg and my nephew Michael were already there hard and work. Rhonda put me to work sorting lawnmower bags which is frustrating. We assume that Pa must have bought a lot of old Toro bags at an auction as we have more than twice as many Toro bags as we do Toro mowers. Rhonda brought a movie (Paul Blart, Mall Cop) over that evening and we enjoyed that with Rhonda and Greg.

    Monday morning Ma and I went to breakfast at the Garden of Eatin’ a local cafe (Galesville is called the Garden of Eden by some so the restaurant’s name fits) before I headed off to the shop for day two. Rain was falling pretty hard most of the day so we were confined to the inside of the shop which hindered our progress some and gets a person depressed pretty quickly. The local paper stopped by to ask questions and take pictures and we called it a day a little early. Rhonda brought over a movie (Bride Wars) and we were all likely in bed before 10 p.m.

    Tuesday we all met at the Garden of Eatin’ for breakfast, the sun was out and it was threatening to be a nice day. Rhonda and I set our sites on moving lawnmower decks from the inside of the building to the outside – let me tell you those things are heavy and I am very grateful for the two wheelers that were on hand to cart them long distances and up the hill. I was put to the task of sorting out and lining up a pile of rear ends that belong to various tractors and riders.

    I am so very grateful that Rhonda is there in Galesville. She has done an amazing amount of work getting everything ready for the auction. When I go into the building I am still overwhelmed at the enormity of it all and how much has yet to be done. I think there are over 100 push mowers, 100 riders, 100 snow blowers, 100 tillers on the first auction block (in addition to the various 1000s of spare parts, the 1949 1/4 ton truck, the fish finned car and god only knows what else. Rhonda (with little help from others) had put this all together for the first auction this Saturday which has helped Ma immensely.

    Thank God for wonderful sisters! I’ll be heading back to the Coulee region in late July just in time for the 2nd auction.

  • WIsconsin Trip – Summer 2009 – part 1 (Chippewa Valley)

    I awoke in DC early Thursday morning and despite the clear skies that followed the severe thunderstorms that night, my flight was canceled. I didn’t know that until I reached the airport – having failed to check my flight status before heading out the door that morning. Delta/NWA booked me on a relatively similar flight and I arrived in La Crosse, WI only an hour or so later than I had planned. Flying into La Crosse, I knew why they call our land God’s country – the land is covered in life – forests of trees, streaming rivers and serenity… just beautiful.

    Rhonda and Ma came to pick me up at the airport and we went to Rocky Roccoco’s for Lunch. If you didn’t know, Rocky’s is Chicago Style pizza and one of the treats that I look forward to when I go home. It’s a wonderful feeling to come home and have a nice lunch with your Ma and your sister. I dropped Ma and Rhonda off in Galesville and took Ma’s car about 100 miles north to Eau Claire, WI.

    I arrived at Pat and Brenda’s about 1:30 or so and found Brenda, Samantha (the graduating one) and Anna (Sam’s friend) hard at work in preparation for the party Saturday. I was greeted with hugs and dog kisses (from the dog Maui) and tried to help as I was directed to.

    Thursday night a friend (Stephanie) was the speaker at the Eau Claire Pacific Group of Alcoholics Anonymous and I was in attendance. Stephanie did a great job sharing her experience, strength and hope and afterward we all all headed to Perkins for a very late meal, I’d say there were about 20 folks in attendance it was good fellowship.

    Friday during the day Pat and I ran errands for his wife and generally helped to prepare the house for all the guests. That evening was the graduation ceremony. We (Pat, Brenda, Stephanie and Anna) were all in attendance for what seemed to be the longest graduation commencement ceremony – ever… The Assistant Principal spoke, they inducted people from the classes of 1945, 55 and 62 into some special recognition group, students talked, principals talked, songs were sung… and finally (2 hours later) they started to hand out diplomas to the 300+ students… when my niece Sam received hers we pleasantly left the building.

    Saturday morning I had breakfast with my biological sisters daughters (or my nieces) Samantha and Tabatha at Perkins. I hadn’t seen either of these girls (women?) since my mother died about 5 years ago. They have both grown up so much and are so very different from the little girls that I used to spin in circles and make smell my socks in my memory. We had a nice breakfast filled with moments of awkward silences and shy moments. I then drove Tabatha home all the way to Fall Creek before heading back to Chippewa Falls for the party.

    Saturday’s party was preceded by temperatures that were in the low 50s and a rain that fell all day long. The party’s spirit threatened to abandon us before the actual festivities… nevertheless the family and friends arrived in the early afternoon and stayed into the evening. Family and friends tend to do that for people they love.

    These types of events are always a double edged sword for me, I do get to see and spend great quality time with people that mean the world to me, and I get a chance to see folks that I don’t see very often – there are plenty of people that I don’t know that are there also and these events do seem to be an excuse for people to hang around and whine about life… sigh.

    I’ve known Samantha since she was about 4 years old and I’ve been called “Uncle Jamez” almost since day 1… for a little while she and her brother called me “James and the Giant Peach” and I am grateful that that finally lost interest with them. Samantha has grown into a fine young woman and I have been amazed at her accomplishments, triumphs and journeys into adulthood. Right now I know she doesn’t know where she wants the future to lead her, but I hope when she chooses a path that that path leads her to a life as filled with loved ones as I’ve managed to assimilate.

  • Family Obligations

    Last night my brother Ryan called to let me know he plans to get married next year, in August, he wanted my mailing address to send an invitation.

    To be honest, I was shocked he had my phone number at all.

    My biological mother died in 2004 and that’s the last real contact I’ve had with any members of my “family”. I flew home for the funeral and spent time with my sisters and brother. At the funeral several members of my mothers immediate family had no idea who I even was, and once they found out it wasn’t long until they started to preach their idea of “God” to me. So it was loads of fun for me to be there. Friends and family bring cards to funerals, and in Wisconsin most of them put some cash in the card. After the funeral my siblings decided to split that money three ways – I spent a lot of money on that funeral and that was probably the last straw for me.

    I had been in therapy for an unrelated matter when she died and one of the things we talked about was my “family”. After the funeral I shared with my counselor the events, attitudes, behavior of “family” and how hard it was for me to go “home” and be a part of my “family”. He asked why I thought I had to, so I spouted “we will not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it” (Alcoholics Anonymous) as my reasoning for seeing them at all. I felt obligated to be there while they passed joints in front of me, drank beer and well… just stayed stuck in the same black hole they’ve been in for a few decades.

    He pointed out to me that love is a two way street and so is communication. He helped me to see that just because she had pushed me out of her vagina was not an automatic debt to love her. I took a look at that and indeed saw that there was no obligation for me to continue to pretend to be a part of something that I’d never felt a part of, not even when I was a kid.

    So, do I feel obligated to go to my “brother’s” wedding next year? No. I figure he just wants money or a gift and I’ve already said I have no intention of visiting WI next year.

  • April 2009 Trip to Wisconsin

    Relief. That’s what I feel that this time i wasn’t going to fly US Airways with their fees, surcharges, surly crew and bad seats. Instead I had booked a flight on Northwest, which has always been a pleasant experience. My flights were on time, my seat was comfortable, it was relaxing! The flight from MSP to EAU on the little plane was a little bumpy, but that was more entertaining than frightening.

    I landed a little early in Eau Claire and had to call Brenda to let her know I was there, she was soon at the airport to scoop me up. She and I drove to Oakwood Mall where we ate Rocky Rococo’s pizza and met up with Pat and then headed back to Chippewa (their home).

    That evening Pat, Brenda and I went to see the new movie Observe and Report, which had a few good one liners but was mostly not worth the money.

    Saturday was mostly uneventful up until we headed out the door for the Pacific Group’s 15th Anniversary Party. Before the party we stopped at Starbucks for coffee, Brenda got hit on by a 20 something kid… made her weekend. At the party is was great to see all the old familiar faces and reminisce about the early days. The food was good, the talk was good, the movie was too long… but it was fun.

    Sunday morning, bright and early, I left for Galesville to see Ma and Rhonda. Ma and I went to breakfast at the Garden of Eatin’ and then we headed down to the shop to meet up with Rhonda and Greg. Rhonda, Greg and I worked hard throwing away broken mowers, snow blowers and other crap that Pa had managed to collect. Around 12 we broke for lunch and then were joined by Michael and a friend of his, more and more stuff was cleared out and sorted. I soon discovered that there was to be a thrift sale April 25 and 26 and two auctions the first of which will be right after my next trip to WI (June 4 – 11). We worked hard and got very dirty. Sunday evening we all met at Ma’s for pizza, Danielle and Cory brought their baby Charles (my first great-nephew) and we all had a relaxing night.

    Monday I was VERY sore, it’s been a long time since I put in a day of manual labor. I had a quick breakfast with Ma and then headed back to Eau Claire. Monday and Tuesday were pretty uneventful at Pat and Brenda’s but it was nice to see and spend time with them.

  • Never Quite What I Expected

    This was quite possibly the oddest year I’ve ever had. I started out the year surrounded by a host of friends supporting me during a small crisis and ended up the year with a host of friends surrounding me during a major crisis. I’ve been very fortunate to have such good friends, family and mentors in my life… and this year it paid off.

    First, the list of Favorite Things of 2008
    Movie: The Dark Knight (Heath Ledger was spectacular and it was a great comic book story)
    Album: Evolver (John Legend) – if you buy any album this year, buy this one
    Video Game: World of Warcraft – Wrath of the Litch King (I am getting a bit bored with the game, it’s been my favorite for 4 or 5 years now)
    TV Show: CSI – lots of changes over at CSI this year, not sure if I’ll like it after all the changes are done but I’m trying to remain open minded.
    Airline: Northwest/Delta – the way they helped me in November was just beyond what I expected – Kudos to them
    Coffee Pot: I got a new one, Cuisinart and it’s the best.. I bought one for Lisa it’s that good
    Gadget: Kindle – electronic books I love this thing and I have a ton of books on it.
    Web page: Facebook – dang this thing is addicting and fun

    As per usual, every Sunday morning if we are in DC – Mark, Robert and i have breakfast somewhere before our Sunday meeting. Annie’s changed their menu this fall so we are currently looking for a new place to eat – we may have found one after much searching.

    I started out the year following up on quitting my job, I had made the decision to quit back in November of 07, and events that happened in December just made me want to hurry out that much sooner. I gave notice, a months notice and told them I’d be happy to help them out for a while until my replacement was settled in. Then I was fired the following week (yes Gary fired). They locked me out of my work station and wiped my Blackberry clean. I was resentful for a while, but most of it got out in my blog and I felt better.

    Jim DiLuigi (who was also fired, but in December) and I wasted no time, but started up Access-Ability Consultants, Inc and have been working steadily since. Its a nice arrangement and we have a lot of fun. This year we made a profit, so that’s a very good thing. We have lots of very busy days and lots of days where we have time for Charlie to send jokes or to find cheap things for Jim to buy at Heartland America. Jim is the Treasurer for Historic Takoma which provides plenty of work for both of us, but doesn’t actually pay the bills 😉

    One of the nicer things about working with Jim is his family. As a result of the new company I’ve been fortunate to get to know some very special people better than I had a chance to know them before: Ana Maria, Lisa (and Rankine), David (and Regina), Mark (and Kate) and Jim’s Mom and brother as well. I will let you know that it got a little tense during some of the political circus this year as the DiLuigi family are not all the same political party… it was fun to see some of the back and forth banter.

    I’ve tried dating this year, been on several dates with several men … yes, JUST dates. There have been some promising candidates, but I’m not going to settle for less than I deserve, why would I want to. I’m still looking and its been a lot of fun. wish me luck.

    The cats (Q and Mouse) are fine, though Q has some kind of psychological disorder – or i assume so cause the Xrays found nothing ($338 later) to tell why he wont poop in the box.

    This was a high school year, not just the faux high school reunion, I also spent time with Eric and Kelly here in DC, and then Eric and I had a great weekend at the Renaissance Fair and Baltimore this fall. Ted, Eric, Rick, Jeff, Tim… hell a ton of folks are on Facebook, so I know what’s going on in their daily lives.

    I took several trips this year.

    In April Suzanne and I spent a weekend in NY (NJ and NY really) and besides someone breaking into her car (they didn’t steal anything, and the Ipod I had bought her for Christmas was in the Jeep – we think they were looking for the GPS) we had a great time. I saw my first play on Broadway – Young Frankenstein. I heard alot about Paul (Suzanne’s fiance) this weekend, but I didn’t get a chance to meet him until December. Suzanne’s dog Destiny had been very old at this point and Suzanne had her put to sleep, it was sad.

    In May I took a trip for my AA birthday (14) I went to Ft Lauderdale, but didn’t have quite as much fun as I normally do (read what you want into that).

    In June I took my first trip to Wisconsin for Scooters going away party. He graduated high school and took off for basic training. It’s always nice to spend time with Pat and Brenda and I, of course drove down to see Ma, Pa and Rhonda in Galesville and also visited Jim’s daughter in Nashville – that was very enjoyable it was nice to spend time with Lisa, her husband Rankine and their dogs Daisy and Buddy. so of course I missed gay pride in DC again… nothing new there.

    In July I took another trip to WI, this time for my pseudo 20 year reunion. Just a few of us decided to meet up and reminisce. It was a trip to see Rosy, Ted, Eric and Jen again. I hope we do it often. It was very nice and I stayed at Ma and Pa’s for 4 days I think. I got back and the next night went to see George Michael perform at the Verizon Center with Mark and Robert – I don’t much care for concerts so that’ll likely be my last one.

    In August, Pat, Brenda and Anna (Scooters girlfriend) came to DC to visit Scooter after Basic and then make me play tour guide… they had fun torturing me. In August a friend, John Dunn, died, it was sudden, unexpected and sad. He was one of the nicest people I ever met here in DC, he was mourned by many across the area.

    In October Jim and I finalized plans to take a trip to Cancun in November, I invited my good friend Brenda to go with me and then gave her a hard time every other day. One day I called and told her that the passport number she gave me was listed as invalid… she turned the car around and headed home… then I told her I was fibbin… she swore then. lol

    So of course the day my Pa died in November (15th) I called her as she was about to board the commuter plane to come to DC for the trip to Cancun and at first she didn’t believe me … don’t cry wolf.

    My Pa dying was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to live through. I cried like I had never cried before and I still miss him. I hope that I will always miss him. I get teary and sad off an on since I found out. I don’t really want to talk about it here… again… I miss my Pa. I am trying to be a better son, trying to be a better brother by staying more in touch with Ma and Rhonda… and as a result I’m trying to be a healthier person also. I had so much support from friends when this happened, and I am so very grateful that they were there and I hope I can be there for them if a similar situation occurs.

    In December I spent 5 days for my birthday in San Diego, exploring, playing tourist and relaxing. It was the most beautiful city I’ve ever seen. I can’t wait to go back.

    The weekend before Christmas I went to Suzanne’s, met her fiance Paul and her new dog Farley. We had a lovely visit.

    That was my year, it went by entirely too fast, but overall it was a good year. The people (salads and dogs) that have moved on this year made me into the person I am today – which is a good thing.

    If you want to know full on details about anything that was written above, try looking at my blog: http://mrjamezq.blogspot.com almost everything that happened this year to me was documented.

    I hope you all have a lovely year and I hope that I may get to share just a tiny fraction of yours with you.

    love

    jamez