Book of Jamez

55 y/o malcontent, something of a writer

Category: Jamez

  • The sum of X and 5 less than X minus three to the fourth power…

    The feel of sex is all around us as his calloused hands caress my face and the tip of his perfectly trimmed goatee grazes my chin; he moves in to kiss me, his breath hot with a hint of mint. I open my mouth to accept his tongue as it penetrates my willing orifice I am suddenly struck by an algebraic formula that will make this night even better: 2x – 30 = 70 means X=50. Our bodies press together and the night explodes into a canopy of eroticism….

    See, I just don’t see where Algebra is going to make a difference in my life. Does your average person use on a daily, weekly, or yearly basis N = P – R + T when solved for P is actually: P = N + R – T? Honestly, when is this information going to be proven useful?

    Let us take a look at the rectangle, I’ve recently learned the formula to determine the perimeter of a rectangle is P = 2L + 2W. This information will somehow prove useful in an office environment? Say when you’re filling up the copy machine?

    If you need to know the perimeter of a triangle is 180 when decorating your house, honestly you’d be better off hiring a gay guy. When do I need to know that a right angle is 90 degrees?

    The truly amazing thing is that I have three more semesters of math, I figured this out with plain old regular math… see I needed 4 Semesters, and I’ve almost completed this one semester… that formula is 4 – 1 = 3 just in case you needed to know.

  • Creepy Guy on The Bike

    I’ve become one of the dreaded neighborhood legends, if you grew up in a small town you know what I’m talking about. There’s that one guy you always see around town riding his bike everywhere, what’s up with that? I imagine the parents warning the children to “stay away, there must be something wrong with that guy” thus is born the legend of the Creepy Guy on the Bike.

    Why does he only ride his bike, where is his car? A real man, a real American would have a car to support the war and the President (when I post blogs that are silly I don’t need to refer to him by his real name: Monkey Boy). He must be a drunk that lost his license or maybe he’s on anti-psychotic medication, whatever the reason, stay away…

    Don’t wave at him! I know he waved first, just keep looking straight ahead, maybe he’ll think we didn’t see him wave.

    Ah, the joys of small town Virginia!

  • Coincidences

    Amazing!

    Every time Monkey Boy (a.k.a George W Bush) makes a speech in favor of the “war” on “terror”

    1. the U.S. SUDDENLY intercepts messages from one terrorist to another

    and or

    2. a “specific threat” occurs in a major metropolitan area

    In a week or two on page 9 of the papers, in a little itty bitty section… we’ll hear this information is several years old…

    O what’s the use anyway? Who is John Galt?

  • Race for the Cure

    On October 22nd, I’ll be running in the Virginia Beach Race for the Cure. A 5K Run in support of Breast Cancer Prevention, Research and Prevention. I’m doing this in honor of Susan Zamer, who passed away this year after a long fight with breast cancer, and my Ma, who is a breast cancer survivor.

    That also means I’m collecting donations, that means YOU! Please donate money by clicking on this link: http://www.active.com/donate/komentidewater/JAppel

    I appreciate all your prayers, support and most especially your donations!!!