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Passing

In 2014 I took and failed the exam for insurance licensure in the state of Arizona 4 times… I kid you not… 4 times. Three of those times I scored 68% (you need 70 to pass) and the last time was under 60 if I remember correctly… ugh

You can only take the test four times in a year… and then you have to wait one calendar year from the last time you failed. That was last October that I was eligible. I was in a class for The Hartford at the time and not feeling at all like that was going well either.

I was pretty overwhelmed by the entire notion… I was going through some shit last fall though so I’ll forgive myself I guess.

Work folk kept pestering me about passing it… we want everyone in the agency to be licensed and knowledgable about the industry (not just for E&O reasons, it’s good to have your staff up to date and ready to deal with whatever is going on in the industry). My team members were also getting pressure so I tried to engage them in studying together – thought it might help, but none of them were willing to put forth the effort with me… so I just started on my own.

The insurance exam book puts me to sleep… so god damn boring, so to get over that I started to type the thing. Then my hands were busy and my mind was busy and it was working, I was retaining the information… but that got old quick… so I decided to just focus on the Lightning Facts and type those… which was better… and I did them over and over and over again. I also purchased the audio version of the lightning facts and listed to them over and over… kept me from having good music in my head which is sad.

It really wouldn’t matter much to me if I passed or not.. if I didn’t actually really love my job. Some people balk at that that I work with, but I really like what we do and who I work with (with a few exceptions that I try to tolerate). My job keeps me busy 8 – 12 hours a day at the office and then at home too… I’m always thinking of my job what we can do to make things better, what’s working, what’s stupid and if I put in enough effort today… yes, I’m a little crazy… but it works for me. I even come home and read insurance articles online, in magazines and then write summaries for a newsletter I do for the office…. I’m crazy, but I love my job..

So I wanted to pass for my job, I want to be a part of this organization for another 10 years give or take. So as long as I continue to do the best I can and help others there I should be good. (I think they like me)

So this morning I was studying for my test – the exam was this afternoon… and I was freaking out thinking about Auto Symbols and if I had them all down or not.. what the fuck was I thinking.. I wasn’t ready….. OMG…

I sat down for a bit, did some mindfulness meditation and took the stress out … and went to take it.

Damn test didn’t ask me about auto symbols at all.. questions are random… I think I spent a little over 2 hours taking the test (170 questions or something like that), read each question twice, found the most appropriate answer and the moved on.. I marked 7 questions to check again at the end – only changed two of my answers.

At the end of the test they give you a survey of the test “how was your experience?” “did you find this enjoyable?” fuck you surveys… fuck you… ok, they didn’t really ask about the enjoyment.

Finally they let me know that the next screen would have my score… I closed my eyes and clicked… took a deep breath… opened my eyes and saw the word “passed”

so that’s that… now I have to fill out some forms tomorrow and I’ll be a licensed agent.

No more damn tests please… ever… 🙂

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