Some Hugs Are Better Than Others

I’m not a hugger… I wonder how many posts have started out that way on my blog? I’ll have to research that some day (anti-hug posts: “My Sponsor Wont Shake My Hand” “Obsess Much?” ). I opted to go to AA over NA because of the hugging that assaulted me at my first NA meeting… it was awful.

Sometimes a hug can be better… special… needed?

When I worked at Children’s Hospital in Washington DC I had a little friend named Donnell that would come in to visit. Donnell was born HIV positive and had to visit the hospital frequently, somehow he became convinced that I was Superman. At the time I had hair… shocking … and wore Clark Kent glasses, my cubicle also sported many different Superman action figures and toys… Donnell hugs were the best for any situation.. he was a great kid. (Read more about Donnell here: Donnell and Superman)

On Friday night I attended the wake of my friend Jim’s mother. Jim is one of the nicest guys I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting – he’s my friend and I’m a better man because of it. I saw him at the wake and got his attention and slam… he hugged me so tight and just filled me with warmth and love and said how happy he was to see me there… that hug filled me and I know it’s not about me at a wake, but it was nice. Hugs from Jim are usually not quite that intense¬†– I’m glad I had the opportunity to be there for my friend.

While at the wake, my sister called and texted … so I figured something must be wrong. But she just wanted to let me know Ma and Uncle Rick were on their way to Phoenix to see me. I had no idea they were coming but this was good news… I eventually found out they’d be in Phoenix Sunday. When I pulled up next to the pick-up truck pulling the camper behind it I saw my Ma – she’s a short, gray haired woman who happened to turn 73 that day… She looks the same as the first day I met her… maybe a new wrinkle or two, but otherwise she’s still Ma. (You can read about my Ma and family in this little poem I wrote a few years ago “foster home” and “I Am a Foster Child“).

IMG_2858Ma came up and hugged me and it was just right.. a hug full of love and caring. She kissed me too you know.. and let me know she loved me… she didn’t have to say anything… it was all in the hug. There’s something about seeing and spending time with your Ma that makes everything better, don’t ya know…

Anyway… maybe I’ll be more open to hugs… maybe, not likely but maybe


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