Wedding Wrench

Planning a wedding can seem like an insurmountable challenge. There are things that keep coming up that I haven’t thought about, things that I thought about but not enough about… it can seem like a lot to get done. Fortunately everything is still months away and will likely go smoother then I anticipate right now.

I sent an email to a hotel in San Francisco for the reception giving them the parameters of the wedding (e.g. how many people, dates, vegetarian, non-drinkers, and so on) and the next day, as promised, I received a call asking me more details about the event which I provided. I was told someone else would be contacting me about specifics.

When that someone contacted me it suddenly became clear to her that Bill and I were both guys, I don’t know how she missed it earlier. She then said “Oh, I was told this was a wedding and didn’t realize it was a commitment ceremony, I’m very excited for you both”.

That was the last I heard from her, I was handed off to someone else who apologized for the “confusion and the change of hands” and said she would be my point of contact from here on out.

I know it may seem silly and petty to some folks, but it’s not a commitment ceremony – it’s a wedding. I am going to marry the man I love in a church, in front of the people who love us and in the eyes of God. I may not be fortunate enough to get the same rights and privileges that straight couples get on that same day, but I will someday and I resent that you think my special day is “less than”.

I want someone to explain how my love of someone of the same-sex is somehow not as valid as the eight times my mother married, the three times Rush Limbaugh married or countless others have been married.

While we were in San Francisco two weekends ago we heard talk that the State of California plans to validate the marriages of any same-sex couples that were married before Prop 8 is finally struck down for good, and they believe it will be. I hope so, but it really doesn’t matter, as far as I’m concerned and as far as the God of my understanding is concerned – Bill and I will be married on June 25.

One thought on “Wedding Wrench

  1. Marriage is among the most lovely things God created. It is one of the channels where we exercise our God-like nature of love and commitment to responsibilities. Profitable marriages and healthy families are not wished to be but they are worked. And building the best foundation is most necessary in case you want your marriage and family to stand the test of time.


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